It is inevitable that many things trigger our manipulative ED thoughts, such as people around us talking about dieting, skipping meals for fun, how ‘fat’ they’ve become etc….Sometimes topics like these are just a pain in the arse to sit through and listen, without it feeling like being stabbed ten times hard.
It is extremely common (well for me at least..) for people to comment on your weight, whether it be a ‘compliment’ on your ‘weight loss’ or a criticism on how ‘pale and lifeless’ you look. These are all huge triggers that makes us think that our actions are justified (i.e. it is okay to purge/restrict and you look so much better when you’re boney, or that you don’t deserve recovery).. but that’s not the case. It is not okay to purge. It is not okay to restrict. It is not okay to give in to any ED behaviors.
You do not need to be skinny and dying. You need to be healthy and happy. You have to recover.
When you hear other people discussing about their new ‘diet’ or the ‘plans that they have to build a summer body’, remember that they have not been through extreme starvation like you have, and that they probably (most definitely) won’t be sticking to it because they are all extremely unsustainable and stupid diet fads that don’t work! If your friends eat less than you during one meal, it doesn’t mean that they are starving themselves.. they have substantial amount of energy and food in their system because they have not been through a phase of restriction. It is COMPLETELY normal for us to feel much more hunger than ‘normal people’ do because our body simply needs more nutrients than them to repair our entire body. It requires a certain amount of food to keep you alive and you shall consume the food that it needs.
You may worry about judgements being made on your eating habits or body appearance but I can tell you that nobody really notices, it’s just your irrational thoughts telling you otherwise. I am 100% sure that other people will not be looking at your body and commenting on the ‘flaws’ that you see, because they don’t exist – again it’s your ED fooling you! Food is fuel and you need fuel to repair your fab body!
Try not to take note of the things that other people say, and certainly do not compare yourself to others. They do not have to repair and recover because they have not done any severe harm to their bodies, but sadly you have – and you need as much energy that you can possibly get so that your body can recover properly. Triggers are everywhere but you just have to fight them with your strength and determination of a strong recovery.
🙂 x
Drizzle of Depression 